When choosing topics for this blog, in most cases I’ve avoided location-specific topics and personal topics, preferring to focus on subjects that would interest the most people. One exception was a previous post titled A Big Ol’ Case of WTF. The title reflects my ongoing reaction to a specific location and much of its population. More can be learned from this article: http://www.kcci.com/article/woman-targeted-on-people-of-des-moines-facebook-page-speaks-out/10394811
1. I guess most people occasionally say things that hurt someone else's feelings unintentionally. But individuals are abusive when they clearly intend to injure someone with their words.
2. It is also the mark of an abuser when they compound it with 'You're just too sensitive' or 'You can't take a joke.' This takes the responsibility off the abuser and places it directly on their 'victim'- not only is the victim left with feeling bad, they're also left powerless, because objecting is said to be some kind of 'defect' on their part.
3. It is compounded further when a 'victim' is held up to public ridicule- I've heard it's a characteristic of psychopaths to enjoy humiliating individuals in front of others. Not only is the pain increased, but so is the powerlessness- 'Let's all laugh at this person.' They 'get their jollies' from seeing someone cringe in embarrassment, shame, etc., because they cannot defend themselves.
One ‘repercussion’ of being in a negative environment for a long period of time is- on virtually any subject- locals asserting ‘They are right and I am wrong.’ I’m sure if I mentioned the article to locals, they’d think it was hilarious- and would state that my objections meant I was ‘a little snowflake with no sense of humor,’ ‘something off-center for considering it wrong,’ and even ‘why should you care if it doesn’t affect you?’ So I decided to take a ‘proactive’ approach and ask opinions of individuals who are elsewhere before saying anything about it myself. Individuals on the east coast, west coast, and even Canada described people who would do such a thing with words like Psychopath.. Sick.. Bullying.. and Sadistic.
Reread the numbered section above. Abuse- with the intent to harm- is wrong. It is made more wrong when a victim or target is made powerless by sadistic individuals asserting that there is something wrong with the person for objecting, and/or putting the person in a position where they cannot do anything in their own behalf.
A second, connected point, though, is input from individuals in other regions and even another country makes it clear the local excuses of ‘Everybody does this,’ and ‘Everybody is ok with these things’ is invalid and inaccurate.
Certainly you can run into random creeps anywhere, but when you have large sections of a population that either harm others simply because they can, or side with abusers over victims, something is very wrong. And when you hear the region referred to as ‘the Heartland,’ this is only one example of how that term is only a reference to a geographical location- it does not reflect the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors of the general population.
1. I guess most people occasionally say things that hurt someone else's feelings unintentionally. But individuals are abusive when they clearly intend to injure someone with their words.
2. It is also the mark of an abuser when they compound it with 'You're just too sensitive' or 'You can't take a joke.' This takes the responsibility off the abuser and places it directly on their 'victim'- not only is the victim left with feeling bad, they're also left powerless, because objecting is said to be some kind of 'defect' on their part.
3. It is compounded further when a 'victim' is held up to public ridicule- I've heard it's a characteristic of psychopaths to enjoy humiliating individuals in front of others. Not only is the pain increased, but so is the powerlessness- 'Let's all laugh at this person.' They 'get their jollies' from seeing someone cringe in embarrassment, shame, etc., because they cannot defend themselves.
One ‘repercussion’ of being in a negative environment for a long period of time is- on virtually any subject- locals asserting ‘They are right and I am wrong.’ I’m sure if I mentioned the article to locals, they’d think it was hilarious- and would state that my objections meant I was ‘a little snowflake with no sense of humor,’ ‘something off-center for considering it wrong,’ and even ‘why should you care if it doesn’t affect you?’ So I decided to take a ‘proactive’ approach and ask opinions of individuals who are elsewhere before saying anything about it myself. Individuals on the east coast, west coast, and even Canada described people who would do such a thing with words like Psychopath.. Sick.. Bullying.. and Sadistic.
Reread the numbered section above. Abuse- with the intent to harm- is wrong. It is made more wrong when a victim or target is made powerless by sadistic individuals asserting that there is something wrong with the person for objecting, and/or putting the person in a position where they cannot do anything in their own behalf.
A second, connected point, though, is input from individuals in other regions and even another country makes it clear the local excuses of ‘Everybody does this,’ and ‘Everybody is ok with these things’ is invalid and inaccurate.
Certainly you can run into random creeps anywhere, but when you have large sections of a population that either harm others simply because they can, or side with abusers over victims, something is very wrong. And when you hear the region referred to as ‘the Heartland,’ this is only one example of how that term is only a reference to a geographical location- it does not reflect the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors of the general population.